I am ten months into motherhood, and I am by no means an expert. I am not trying to tell you that you must breastfeed or judge if you don’t, but rather, I want to share my journey with you. And if needed, I hope this blog gives you the extra encouragement on those tough breastfeeding days.
Before my daughter was born, I wasn’t super passionate either way about breastfeeding. I knew I wanted to try it, but if it didn’t work, it didn’t work.
Little did I know that breastfeeding would become my biggest, greatest, and let’s be honest, toughest, surprise as a new mom.
And before I even begin, never would I have imagined I would be blogging and sharing about such a personal journey in my life! But here we are. You could say that motherhood has changed me.
From Day 1, my daughter Lainey and I made a great pair. We didn’t have any issues with latching, tongue tie, milk supply, etc. But even so, the first couple of weeks (maybe even the first month) of breastfeeding was tough! My body was healing and was trying to find energy from the sleep deprived fog I was in. Alarms were going off at all hours of the day and night (three, sometimes even two hours apart) to feed her. Getting her back to her birth weight in the first two weeks of her life was no easy task, especially when my chest was aching.
Early into new motherhood, I learned I had Raynaud’s syndrome, which required a cream, and had a mysterious lump that led to uncomfortable appointments, an ultrasound, and antibiotics. The diagnosis: mastitis.
I have one distinct memory of almost throwing in the towel. Lainey was around 2 weeks old. I remember laying in our bed, crying from the pain. I had ice packs on my chest, and didn’t know if I could continue. I was aching and feeling defeated. The easy thing to do would have been to stop. But then, I remembered all the wonderful things my friends shared with me about breastfeeding. If I stopped now, I wouldn’t get to experience all the amazing things they told me about! Their voices in my head helped me continue, and for that, I am sincerely thankful.
Like a lot of other things in motherhood, breastfeeding got easier. It quickly became my biggest surprise and most rewarding responsibility as a new mom. Despite the day’s worries or stresses, breastfeeding brings me a calmness. The world seems to stop and all that matters is my sweet daughter in my arms. The bond and connection we created is undeniable. I look forward to our moments together every single day.
Don’t get me wrong, there are still tough days. We recently went through a phase of biting. It was rough! The other night, my daughter fed for two hours straight before bedtime. I was exhausted! Physically, mentally, and emotionally drained.
And still, I am obsessed. Never would I have ever imagined this!
So if you find yourself needing a little extra encouragement or motivation, let me be that voice for you. You are doing great, Mama! You are making such an amazing sacrifice to feed your baby! There will be a time when this gets much easier! I promise it is worth it!